Don't you love surprises!?
Um I want to begin this by saying I'm guy, that's not foreign to the world of fetishists and I found your story pretty interesting though I've only read about 5 pages so far.
I'm just leaving a suggestion here; I don't know if you two ever planned on turning this into a physical comic but (assuming that since you're both in the comic world you are interested in anime/manga and have knowledge of the show naruto) I've always my own version of IchaIcha to read.
So if you'll ever decided to put this through print I would appreciate it if there was a travel-sized picture-novel version. What I mean by that is it would be a novel but it would also have illustrations (page long?) of important or climatic scenes. (climatic in a literary sense )
Since it was never actually shown what was in the Icha Icha books, everyone has their own ideas but the most popular idea in my opinion is that it's romantic erotica with a good story. So uh, yeah that would be awesome.